Constructive Conversations With FOUR

Posted by on July 30, 2013 in Hot Blog Topics | Comments Off on Constructive Conversations With FOUR

A model for approaching difficult coaching situations with confidence.

Framing – Elevating the conversation from a focus on personal failure to personal improvement

  • Sharing the Big Picture context for the conversation
  • Sharing the Purpose for the conversation
  • Sharing the Desired Outcomes for the conversation

 “Bob, your meeting today really took a right angle turn and missed the outcome it was intending to achieve.  Could we schedule a time to meet and discuss possible alternatives for assuring success the next meeting?  When is a good time for you during the next few days?”

Openness – Being open to considering new ideas and options

  • Staying open to learning and change as options are discussed
  • Holding judgment at bay
  • Resisting being the expert and know-it-all

 “Time for preparation is an issue and one we will have to deal with as we move forward.  What ideas do you have about carving out time for meeting planning and preparation?”

Understanding – Reflecting understanding of what others hold important

  • Listening for others ideas and option, then reflecting them in your words
  • Holding personal filters, limiters and choices at bay
  • Adjusting your strongly held beliefs and preferences to encompass or shift them in the moment

“Keeping the purpose and agenda posted is a good idea and one I hadn’t considered.  I’m going to try that as well, to see if it helps better focus the meeting on the purpose and outcomes to be achieved.”

Reciprocity – Meeting each others needs over time

  • Keeping the give and take of a long term relationship in mind
  • Helping others and helping yourself over time
  • Looking for and making opportunities to support and help

 “Meetings are typically a time waster unless we find better ways to make them productive.  I think some of our ideas are good ones for sharing with everyone and refining as norms for meetings in the future.”

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